Today my cousin arrived and asked me if I would show him how to “Do Four”. I told him to come back when he had got his three balls down solid first. He proceeded to show me an almost perfect 3 ball juggle and also a behind the back throw for good measure. I gaped. I didn’t know I was such a good teacher.

I taught him the four ball fountain, leant him an extra ball and told him to meet me at St Mary’s church hall that evening at seven. I’m hoping he’ll be put off juggling before he gets too good for me to teach him anything more. I think a juggling club meeting will do the trick.

I got a phone call from www.jugglingstore.com asking me the colour of the clubs I wanted. I said that 6 white ones will do nicely. They said I’d get them tomorrow.

This afternoon I went to find a job and was surprised to find notice in the job centre for “A Juggler”. I enquired at the desk as to what this involved and was told it was in a cocktail bar. I’d have to mix the drinks and throw bottles and the like. I took the address and found the bar. After a quick interview I got the job. I impressed the manager with a bottle, glass and ice cube juggle. I start work tomorrow. The thing is I told him I had experience with bar work and flairing but I’ve done neither before. I only caught the ice cube in a glass by accident and thought it would be clever to pour the drink behind my back after a fumbled catch of the bottle.

When I arrived home I took out some bottles of Bud that I had in the fridge and practiced catching them upright on the back of my hand. I failed. I tried catching a bottle behind my back and smashed it on the floor. I picked up the pieces of glass and I hope my sister wont notice the smell or the damp carpet. I hope I have better luck tomorrow at work, every bottle or glass I smash comes straight out of my pay packet. And I still don’t know what is in a Harlem Mugger cocktail.

Ah well.

I headed down to St Mary’s and found everyone already in the hall. There was a whole load of people passing down one end and the rest were watching someone do contact juggling. I put my watch right, put it in my pocket and looked around for my cousin. I presumed he had got bored with juggling and didn’t bother to turn up but then I spotted him: he was the feeder in the three man club passing pattern.

I went round telling everyone that I had taught him to juggle and that I was such a good teacher that he had got so proficient within a day and a half. Everyone looked at me funny.

At the end of the two hours I asked my cousin if he still liked juggling and he said that he had been juggling in the park that afternoon and some girls had come over and watched him. He told me how he had got one of their numbers and was going out with them for a date tomorrow.

How come I’ve never got girls by juggling? This just isn’t fair.

He also showed me how far he had got with his five ball cascade. I’m a bit disconcerted that he’s picking this up so quickly. It wasn’t even me taught him five.

We all went around the corner to the pub and drank for a bit. All except my cousin because at fifteen he wasn’t old enough to get served alcohol. He insists he normally gets served but I just laughed at him.

I asked everyone if they could show me any tricks with glasses. Someone showed me how they can balance a bottle on their forehead, flick it up and catch it upside down pouring into a glass with their ear. My cousin showed me how to drop a full glass and catch it on his foot.

I went home feeling slightly drunk and entirely unconfident.

Ah well.

I fumbled with my model making and realised I could in no way suspend 11 rings and a ball in mid air. I didn’t have this problem with my Michael Moschen because he was holing on to the balls as in his act. It’s quite a problem; I’ll sleep on it.